Common Pranks
by Lvmj
Summary: Selphie goes on the war path to find the ones who pranked her and the entire female dorms. But what would happen afterwards?
1. Chapter 1

Lvmj: Decided to branch out and try my hand at other fics. This one just ran through my head just about….-checking the time-…..27 minuets ago. Be for warned, the characters might be out of "Character" themselves. You'll understand soon enough. Well, without further delay, here's the fic!

Chapter One: The Shower Mishap

The icy winter wind blew across the Garden with ease, blowing the multicolored leaves onto the outside halls that led to the dorms. Small crystals of ice could be seen in the Moon light on the edges of the roof, sidewalks, trees, and railings.

But did this stop anyone from venturing outside? Not even if there were a hoard of monsters outside. Three men were barley noticeable in the night time. They each held a certain object in their hands.

Zell Dincht crouched down below the railing holding a bottle of purple liquid.

"Hey guys, are you sure it's okay to be doing this?" Zell asked, looking around franticly.

In front of Zell was a man known as Seifer Almasy, who was holding a kind of pack of tools. "Listen chicken wuss, it's too late to back down. Your either coming with us, or we'll have to duck tape your ass to the pole. Got it?"

Zell mumbled something about 'duck tape your ass to the pole' but nodded. Besides, it was going to be fun, for the guys that is.

Behind Zell was the man famous for his hat and gun, Irvine Kinneas, who was actually holding duck tape.

"Don't worry Zell, we'll be alright. Just don't trip or we will leave you behind," Irvine said as they neared the girl's dorms.

"Alright men, lets do this quick and easy!" Seifer said in a whisper as he went to work on the door with his tools.

"I wonder if Squall would be doing this with us," Zell said, not really directing the question to anyone. But Seifer then got a brilliant idea.

"Thanks chicken wuss, you just gave me a great idea."

OOO

Early that morning, Selphie Tilmitt, a rather hyper girl, was just getting up in her own room, stretching her arms to the sky in a light yawn. She then proceeded to hop off the bed and made her way to the bathroom.

"Today feels like a good day!" Selphie then decided to look outside and saw rain was now falling on the icy ground. "Besides the coldness and rain, of course, but still a good day!" She skipped the rest of the way right into the shower.

Humming to herself, it wasn't long until she was in the shower. Around the same time the other girls were also in the shower. Unknown to them, there was something funny in the water that morning.

Selphie soon became aware that her body was itching. "Hmm, a bug no doubt got in here with me." Then the itching became more and more severe. "What's going on?" In a panic, Selphie jumped out of the shower, wrapping the shower curtain around herself.

"Ahh! My hair!" Selphie heard down the hall. It belonged to Rinoa Heartilly

"Rinoa! Are you okay?" Selphie yelled as she ran to the door, opened it, and ran full blast out of it.

That was until a thick wall of duck tape hit her. "No fair!" she whined as she squirmed.

Meanwhile Rinoa was looking at her now bright blue hair. Someone had switched her shampoo. "Selphie! Someone broke into our dorm!" Rinoa then ran out her door, only to hit duck tape. "What the…?"

More screams could be heard when the other girls started to pile out of their rooms only to hit the duck tape.

Suddenly, the wall began to fall down. "Oh no!" was all heard from the girls as they collided with eachother on the floor and began to roll around.

"Stop rolling, your only to get us even more stuck!" another voice said. This was Quistis Trepe.

"Quisty, help!" Selphie said along side Rinoa as the girls quickly began to be rolled into a large roll of some kind.

Selphie and the rest found each other squished by someone. It was then a note came into view of Selphie in the carnage of the duck tape. It read…..

_Hey girls, sorry for the mess. Oh how I wish I could see your faces. Oh well. Take care loves, try not to hurt yourselves with that tape._

_XoXoXoXo_

_Seifer, Zell, Irvine, and…._

The next name came as a shock to her as she read it multiple times. It was really hastily written but Selphie was so mad to realize this.

"Squall, I'll get you guys back!"

In his office Squall Leonhart looked up sharply from his desk with his famous poker face. "Something doesn't feel right."

Lvmj: Sorry for the shortness, but I thought it be best if I left off of there. Hope you all liked it. Although I kind of feel bad for Squall.


	2. Hell has no fury like a woman with

Lvmj: Okay, I'm back with another exciting episode! Er, chapter I mean! But wouldn't it be so cool if we could turn our fanfiction into 30 minute shows per chapter??? Oh well, lets begin! Oh, by the way, might have spelled Selphie's weapon wrong. Dunno.

Chapter Two: Hell has no furry like a woman with giant Nunchakus

Squall massaged his head with little frustration. More papers had just arrived from a female student, who looked actually a bit sad to stand in the room with him.

"Um…Commander?" she said in a timid voice.

"Yes?" Squall said, throwing down the documents he had picked up from the desk to look at her.

The student flinched at his action, thinking she was in trouble. "You, uh, you were here early in the morning, right?"

"Yes, I was working on the mission stats from three days ago. Why?"

"Oh! Just wondering! Sorry!" she said as she bowed several times to apologize.

"Dismissed," Squall said emotionless. But before he even ended the word, the student was gone in a puff of smoke.

Squall blinked twice before continuing his work. "I am not that bad, am I?" He simply shrugged and got back to work on the documents.

Already garbed in her yellow outfit, Selphie whistled a light tune as she twirled her nunchakus around by her side.

"Morning!" she said cheerfully to anyone who came across her. Selphie came to a stop when she saw one of the attackers.

Zell was currently a couple of yards away, showing off his boxing stance and moves. With a mischievous smile, Selphie held her weapon behind her as she skipped over to Zell.

Zell in the meantime was thinking on what Seifer had told him after the prank was pulled.

"_Act normal! Don't even let Selphie see your nervous!" Seifer said._

"_But didn't we already sign our names?" Irvine said in a casual tone. A vein popped up on Seifer's brow. _

"_I know! Just act casual!"_

"Heya Zell!" Selphie said, bringing Zell out of his daydream.

"Ah, oh! H-Hey Selphie! What's up?"

Selphie's smile widened. "Glad you asked!" With that she whipped out her nunchakus and slammed it upwards in between Zell's legs.

Zell immediately opened his mouth to voice his pain, but no sound came out. It was so painful that Zell couldn't even make a peep! He held his injury with both hands and slowly tilted to the side before crashing down on the ground.

Many onlookers winced at Zell's pain, especially the guys.

Selphie crouched down to Zell with the same smile. "To answer your question of 'What's up,' not you, Zell," she said in a very pleased voice.

As she walked away, a crumpled piece of paper fell out of her pocket. Zell managed to seize it to see what it was.

"Th-Th-The note?" he stuttered. If was then his eyes glanced down. "Oh…hell, Squall better…run." With that he lost consciousness as a student called down the nurse.

Squall felt a sneeze come on but suppressed it. "I need to get out of this office."

His phone began to ring, causing him to groan. "Damn it," he said as he picked it up. "Yes?"

"Squall, come down to the nursing station! Zell's hurt!" a Doctor Kadowaki said.

"Understood," Squall said as he put the phone down, wondering what happened to Zell. "At least I'm going out of this office," he said as he equipped his gunblade to its holster.

Shortly after Squall showed up in the nurses wing.

"Here he is," Doctor Kadowaki said, gesturing to Zell who was on the bed. When Squall rounded the corner, a twitch on his lips was dangerously coming close to a smile then to a laugh.

Zell was on the bed with a cast wrapped around his pelvic bone and a large ice pack placed right in the middle of it.

Squall, straining not even to smile, sat down in a chair beside Zell.

"Zell, who… who did this to you?" Squall said, his voice almost cracking. But Zell saw it as choking up tears.

"S-s-Selphie," Zell said as his hand rose to give Squall the note. Squall calmly took it and scanned it once over. Then again and again' preferably the ending where they signed their names.

With a stern and grim face he stood up and drew out his gunblade and pointed it at Zell.

"Whoa!" Zell said with much energy that he seemed to have hidden. "I know what you're thinking, it wasn't my idea!" But Squall raised the gunblade high above his head in striking stance. "Squall, no!"

Squall slammed down through the ice and cast but suddenly brought it back up and rested it on his shoulder before turing away and walking out of the nurses station.

Zell's cast and ice fell around him, but he was not even scratched. "Damn Squall, he couldn't have cut it closer?" he said, thanking that Squall didn't want to cleave him in two.

Squall, with his gunblade back in its holster, thought around two years ago when Selphie went overboard. "I better set things straight with Selphie before I end up where Zell is."

Lvmj: Well there you go, the second chapter. I think I got the Doctor's name wrong. Things are heating up! Special thanks to my first reviewer Oakysan0108! Come down and get your prize...That is if I can find it, I should have kept it on a chain. ANYWAY, have a great day everyone!


	3. Two Years ago

Lvmj: Alright! Chapter three is up! Sorry for the wait, school has been a bugger.

Chapter Three: Two years ago

Squall was still walking down the hall, his hand firmly on the hilt of his gunblade. His eyes darting everywhere to get a sign from Selphie. It was then that he bumped into a male that was wearing a very familiar hat.

"Irvine!" Squall said as he grabbed Irvine's shirt collar and pushed him into the wall.

"Yo Squall! What's up?" Irvine said with a nervous grin.

Squall took a moment to calm down but he still kept Irvine to the wall. "Tell me the truth, did you put my name on this letter?" Squall said as he held the crumbled letter.

Irvine read it quickly and reread it at where Squall's name was written. "No, it wasn't me. Where you with us that night, preferably in the girls dorm?" Irvine said with a sly grin and a twinkle in his eye.

"What? No!" Squall said, understanding what he meant. "So if it wasn't you then it's…Seifer?" Squall said as Seifer suddenly bolted right past them.

"Heads up! Selphie's running our way!" Seifer yelled out, still running.

"Seifer! I got to have a word with…did he just say Selphie's coming?" Squall said stone faced at Irvine.

"Let's get the hell out of here!" Irvine said as Squall and himself took off after Seifer and away from Selphie, who had just rounded the corner to see them take off.

Instead of running after them, Selphie smiled and brought out a control that had a single red button.

Right above them several feet away was a large mechanical hand, usually used for heavy lifting, holding something that looked like a giant boulder. The hand then released boulder in a flinging way as it crashed down behind Squall and Irvine.

"What the…she's been watching Indiana Jones too much!" Irvine said. Squall nodded, remembering the day he got the movie as an apology for what happened two years ago.

"This time she's getting a board game," Squall said as the boulder dangerously gained speed.

_Two Years Ago….._

"_Are you sure about this?" Squall said as Seifer struggled to get his weapon out of the tree with Selphie's nunchakus. Irvine and Zell were currently holding up Seifer to reach it._

"_Don't give me that 'are you sure about this' crap," Seifer said. "It's your fault it's up here in the first place!"_

_Squall scoffed as he crossed his arms. "Don't blame me when you can't properly hold your gunblade."_

_A vein popped out of Seifer's head as he swung madly at his gunblade. "Hey! Calm down up there!" Zell said._

"_Your going to make us tip you over!" yelled Irvine. _

_Suddenly one of Selphie's nunchakus hit the gunblade on the sharp side and made a fair slice right in it. The action caused the gunblade to wobble and fall. _

"_I got it!" Seifer said as he threw the nunchakus at Squall and made a dive for his gunblade, kicking off Zell and Irvine who fell back. _

_Squall caught the nunchakus and inspected it. "Oh crap," Squall said when he noticed the damage. _

_Seifer by now was walking back to Squall with his gunblade. Zell and Irvine were picking themselves off the ground, muttering something about using Seifer as the ladder next time. _

"_Thanks for the catch, Squall," Seifer said as he snatched Selphie's weapon out of his grasp. _

"_H-hey, wait a second!" Squall said as he chased after Seifer. _

_Seifer met Selphie in the training room and handed the weapon over just as Squall came storming through the doors, followed by Zell and Irvine. _

"_Thanks Seifer! I have been itching to try out my new weapon!" Selphie said happily as she skipped to the nearest gnat. _

"_Seifer, get over here!" Squall said in a loud whisper while waving over at Seifer. _

"_What?" Seifer said as a loud crack was heard a few feet away. Seifer jumped a little and whirled around to see what it came from. _

_Selphie's other end of her weapon completely snapped in half. The other half of the weapon was currently stuck in the dead gnat's head. _

"_What…did a you do to my weapon!" Selphie said as she turned to face all four of them with a lust to kill them written on her face. _

"_S-Selphie, I am sure it was just an accident," Irvine began to say before Selphie went over and ripped the other half of the nunchakus out of the gnat and threw it at him. _

_It hit him square in the eye and knocked him back off his feet. _

"_Accident my ass!" Selphie said. _

_Everyone by now was afraid of Selphie, since she normally wasn't this angry or violent. Squall even shifted his stance nervously while looking at Irvine. _

_Selphie then held up her palm wide open. "Five," she simply said. Irvine by now was standing up with a black eye. _

"_Five?" Squall said, taking one step back. _

"_Four," Selphie said, raising her weapon. _

"_Hey Squall, what do you think she's…Squall?" Zell said as he saw Squall take off. _

"_She's giving us five seconds to run! Get the hell out of here!" Squall said. _

"_Three," Selphie said as the number of fingers standing up on her end decreased. _

"_Run!" Zell said as Seifer sped past him, tripping him in the process. Irvine managed to jumped over the falling Zell and was about to turn back to help him when he saw Selphie had some how run up behind them and was now standing over Zell. _

"_Two," Selphie said as Zell started to crawl towards Irvine. _

"_Hurry Zell, hurry!" Irvine said, beckoning Zell with his hands. _

"_One…," Selphie said as she walked up to Zell and stepped on his back, pinning him down. _

"_Irvine!" Zell cried out just to see Irvine turn and other way and dart out of the training grounds. _

"_Should have ran, Zell. Now were going to play a little game," Selphie said as she twirled her remaining nunchakus in her hand. _

_Zell barely had enough time to scream before Selphie launched her attack, a scream that echoed far into the Garden. _

Lvmj: I got to say I had a field day writing the Two Years section, going to continue that in the next chapter. Ah, by the way, if you see a creature that has the name "Fluffy" on its name tag rampaging threw Texas, it's my fault. Tried to keep that thing on a lease for a present for the first reviewer of this story. Hmmm, maybe I should get a big tranquilizer gun. Ah, anyway, hope you like this story! Tell me what you think.


	4. Two Years ago part Two

Lvmj: Back by popular demand! Ha, not really, at least to my understanding. Well, anyway lets get back to the story!

Chapter Four: Two years ago: part two

Squall and Irvine dove to the side to escape the giant boulder. Seifer, already way ahead of them, took off toward the male dorms.

Squall looked back just in time to see the boulder puncture the wall closest to them.

"Let's go Irvine!" Squall said as he helped Irvine up and began to run to his own office.

"She's right on our tail!" Irvine said as they heard small pitter patter of Selphie's foot steps. That was then that Squall saw Quistis.

"Quistis! Great timing!" Irvine said as he spun around Quistis for her to act like a shield against Selphie.

Squall slowly stopped to look at the event. He then felt a chill up his spine when Quistis smiled and turned around to face Irvine.

"Irvine…I don't think Quistis is here to help," Squall said as he backed up a little.

"What? Squall you gotta be more trusting! Quisty here wouldn't…," Irvine was cut short as Selphie rounded the corner, smiling and skipping a little. Quistis then put her hands on Irvine's shoulders and held him tightly.

"Squall…Squall!" Irvine said as he struggled to get out of her grasp.

Squall quickly ran over to Irvine and grabbed him, pulling him away from Quistis's grasp.

Suddenly, Quistis whipped out her whip and flung it at the two running men. The Whip rapped around Irvine's foot and tripped him.

"She got me!" Irvine wailed out as Quistis and Selphie dragged him back.

Squall was about to go back for him until numerous long-ranged weapons were thrown at. Squall bobbed and weaved through the mess, even blocking some with his gunblade.

It was then that he noticed a small army of females behind Selphie and Quistis. Even Rinoa was there!

"Aw hell," Squall said as Irvine whimpered in fear.

_Two Years ago…._

_Squall, Irvine, and Seifer all sped up once Zell's scream reached their ears. Once they thought they were at a safe distance, they all slid down a wall and came to a rest. _

"_Selphie's pissed," Irvine said as he fanned himself with his hat. _

"_No kidding," Squall said, trying to catch his breath. _

"_I wonder why…," Seifer said as he raised his hand to rub his chin in thought. Squall and Irvine gave him a look that literally said "you ass," at him. _

"_Well, we better start moving. Who knows where Selphie will turn up," Squall said as him and Seifer were the first ones up. _

"_Who knows is right!" Selphie said cheerfully as she popped out over the railing that was over them with a large water hose. _

_Squall and Seifer saw this and bolted out of the way as Selphie turned on the powerful hose, only to unleash it's power on Irvine. _

"_What the…," were the only words Irvine spoke until he was washed under it. _

_Squall and Seifer, seeing Irvine already out, starting running up to the elevator for the sake of their lives. Both men then dove into the elevator just into time to see Selphie's nunchakus hit the frame of the elevator and bounce off. _

"_I suggest we hide," Seifer said as they reached the second floor. "But where too hide is the question." _

Present time….

Seifer, seeing as he got to a dead end, went back to see if he can get to the elevator. As he rounded the corner, he was faced with the backs of many females all glaring at Squall.

"Oh crap," he silently said to himself as he pondered how to get out of there. He then saw Squall at the other end and waved at him.

Squall saw this and let out a sigh. Seifer was the only ally at this point.

"What's that!?" Squall said so suddenly and loudly. None of the girls looked up as Squall muttered a curse. Squall then let loose a fire ball towards the ceiling, catching the eyes of the girls at what Squall just released. Seifer saw this and took off through the bunch of females just as Squall started to take off.

"Hey, that's Seifer!" Rinoa said as all the girls looked down just to see Seifer run out of the group and after Squall.

"Get them!" Selphie said as she whipped on a captain hat that appeared to be made out of paper. All the females then started to run after the two men, stomping on a yelling Irvine on the way. Once they passed, Irvine let out a cough and started to crawl his way to the infirmary.

"I wonder how Zell is doing," Irvine weakly said.

Meanwhile Seifer and Squall were still running from the girls.

"I think Selphie just lost it!" Seifer said as he caught up with Squall.

"You don't say?" Squall said sarcastically as they ran into the cafeteria.

Both men jumped over the counter and held up a finger to the female workers there to their lips. The workers nodded at them and continued to work.

The masses of girls entered the cafeteria. "Hey, did you see a couple of guys come in here?"

"Yup, right here," the lady worker said as Squall and Seifer let their mouths drop.

"Damn it!" Squall said as he stabbed a bag of flower with his blade and threw it into the crowd of girls. Seifer did the same thing, causing a mass hysteria.

"Can't trust anyone female here!" Seifer said.

"We need to get to the second floor!" Squall said, crawling through the girls feet. Seifer followed his lead as they made it out of the crowd, white as snow.

"Get them!" Quistis said as they were spotted.

Squall then looked at his surroundings, noticing there were no other people in the area.

"Hey Seifer," Squall said as they headed towards the infirmary.

"What?" Seifer said.

"Just where are the other male students?" Squall said as he and Seifer stopped just before the elevator.

Lvmj: Alrighty! Chapter is done. Ah, by the way, Fluffy has been apprehended by its owner. I just wonder who's going to pay for the damages…maybe I should hide for a bit. See ya!


	5. Two Years ago: Final Part

(1-30-2008) Lvmj: Sorry for the long wait, my hands are not in the best of shape, kinda losing some feeling in my left ring finger and pinky finger, so here I am typing with a couple of pencils. Don't know how long it's going to take, but I am going to finish this chapter!

(2-18-2008) Lvmj: Ha, in the end I had to ask for help from a friend. Enjoy.

Chapter Five: Two Years Ago: Final

"So, you got a plan?" Seifer said as the elevator slowly went up.

"Yeah, hide until this blows over," Squall said calmly while crossing his arms.

"Again, like last time?" Seifer said, a little shocked.

"Well, we might have to go look for the other male students. Besides, you wouldn't want to go up against Selphie and the entire female students, do you?" Squall said as the elevator came to a stop.

"Unless it has something to do with my room…," Seifer said, earning him a stern look from Squall. "Okay, okay…you got a point."

_Two years ago…_

_Seifer and Squall ran out of the elevator right past Rinoa. "Guys?" she said as they both came to a corner. _

_Someone had buffered the floor that day, making Squall slip and slide into the wall, along with Seifer who crashed into him. _

"_Some of a…," Seifer started to say until the elevator door let a 'BING!' sound out. Squall and Seifer both looked to see that Selphie had some how got a hold of Irvine's gun. _

"_Get up!" Squall said as he pushed Seifer away from him and rolled back, just in time to avoid a shot from the shotgun. _

"_Are you trying to kill us?" Seifer yelled at her. Squall also wondered the same thing until he noticed the wall. _

"_Rubber bullets?" Squall said as he looked at the bullets laying on the ground and the small indentions in the wall. _

"_Oh, I don't want to kill you, just hurt you till the point of death!" Selphie said as she started blasting at the two men. _

_Squall was the first to react as he ran to Seifer, hauled him up by the collar of his jacket, and dragged him down the hallway. _

"_I can get up you…AH!" Seifer said as a bullet hit him in the leg. Squall looked back as Selphie started to reload the shotgun. _

_Squall then threw Seifer into the classroom and jumped into the classroom to avoid the bullets from the newly reloaded shotgun. _

_Seifer landed roughly on a desk and rolled over it while Squall hit the wall at an angle. Quickly getting up, he closed the door and locked it just as Selphie came into sight._

"_Darn it!" Selphie said as she started banging on the door with Irvine's gun. _

"_Come on Seifer, this door isn't going to last long!" Squall said as he and Seifer, who was limping a little, hobbled their way over to the windows in the back. _

_Suddenly the door exploded into pieces as Selphie stepped through, coughing a bit from the explosion. _

"_How the hell she do that?" Seifer said as Selphie put one of her nunchakus in the shotgun. _

"_Grenades!" Selphie said in a cheery voice as she shot out the nunchaku at Seifer. _

_Seifer had no time to react as the nunchaku flew a bit low and struck him right between the legs. Seifer cupped his injury with both hands as his face turned blue from shock. "I think one of them popped!" Seifer said as he slid down the wall. _

_Squall stood there with his mouth opened and turned to Selphie as she aimed the remaining nunchaku at Squall. _

_But as she fired, Squall moved to the side and let the nunchaku spear right through the window, shattering it. _

_Seeing this, Squall took out his gun blade and jumped on the edge of the window. He then stabbed the roof of the Garden from the window and used it as a leverage to prop himself on the top. _

"_No fair!" Selphie said as she ran right after him. But being too short, she couldn't get to him. "Darn it!"_

Present time…

"So that's how you did it," Seifer said as they ran to the classroom.

"Yeah, now lets just hurry until they catch up!" Squall said just as they entered the classroom.

They both stopped cold at what they saw covering the entire window wall. "Well, we found the male students," Seifer said.

Across the wall were men duck taped to the wall. Tape was over their mouths along with makeup that the girls must have done to them.

"Let's get them down!" Squall said as he started to pull at the poor students.

Seifer, grumbling, was pulling on a young student that was wedged between other men. "How much duck tape did she use?" Seifer said.

Squall just happens to look to his side to see empty roles of tape scattered in the corner.

"A hell of a lot that's for sure."

Suddenly sounds of heavy footsteps came from the elevator towards them.

"We are screwed, aren't we?" Seifer said after he gave up on the student.

"Pretty much…hide?" Squall suggested.

"Good idea," Seifer said. He then looked at the male students. "We'll be back with some scissors, can't risk cleaving you all with our blades."

Seifer and Squall then immediately jumped over a random desk and hid underneath it as Selphie and her army came through the door.

"Now where did they go?" Selphie said along with the other female students.

Lvmj: Sorry for the shortness, it's all I could do right now. Hope you liked it!


	6. Falling Down

Lvmj: I am back! Although not at full 100, I am back! Hands are still a bother but, damn it, I am going to get this story done!

Chapter Six: Falling Down

Squall was mentally cursing at himself for taking refuge underneath a desk. He was the Commander of this Garden; he should handle every issue at the Garden.

Then again, when an issue involves Selphie, he gets more then he bargained for.

"Where oh where could my Squally Wally be? Oh where oh where can he be?" Selphie sung as she kicked a desk over.

Squall's mouth hung open a little from shock. "Is Selphie really this crazy?" Squall wondered to himself.

"Where oh where could my Seifer...Seifer...," Selphie couldn't really think of a rhyming name for him. "Where can he be!?" she said as she kicked over another desk. That desk landed right over Squall's hiding desk, blocking his escape root from it.

So there he was, in darkness, hearing Selphie kick over other desks.

"Squall, Squall!" Seifer whispered over at him from the other desk. Squall peeked out his eye, which was the only thing he could peek out, at Seifer. "I got a plan!" he said in a strained whisper.

In his hand a fire ball was forming and slowly growing larger. Squall smiled and prepared his own fire ball. There was still a chance of escaping, even if they get hurt doing it.

Meanwhile, Selphie had finished kicking over the desks that were not covering Squall or Seifer. It was then she smiled at the two remaining desks.

"Found you!" Selphie said in a singing voice as she skipped over to them. She then noticed orange light escaping from the desks. "What?"

Suddenly, a large explosion filled the room, blowing the girls away into the wall and the desks scattering them over the room.

Selphie coughed and waved away the dust. When the dust cleared, she looked at where the explosion came from. Her eyes, along with the duck-taped men and the blown up women's eyes, grew large at the demolished floor.

Two large holes were blasted from it, leading to the first floor.

"Wow, they are persistent," Quistis said as Rinoa let out a low whistle.

"Let's get them!" Selphie cried out as she prepared to jump down the hole, only to be stopped by the rest of the females.

"Let's take the elevator!" all of them said at the same time.

Squall and Seifer landed roughly on the first floor. Squall was face down on the floor with several cracks leading away from the impact. Seifer was on his back in a large pot that was no broken. It once held beautiful flowers.

"You alive?" Squall muffled out to Seifer.

"Yeah, ow," Seifer said as he rolled out of the pot and onto his feet. Squall stood up a little groggy but alright.

"Looks like we landed in front of the infirmary," Squall said, pointing to the sign.

"Good. Let's get in there and lock the door," Seifer said as he trudged along with Squall to the infirmary. But because of the fall, they were forced to hold up each other.

"Hey, quick thought," Squall said to Seifer.

"What?"

"Do you think Dr. Kadowaki is on their side... do you?" they both stopped right at the entrance to the gate.

"I...don't know," Squall manage to say right before a spear lodged itself right beside his head on the nearby wall.

Squall kept his strait face, still looking at Seifer. "Please...please tell me that wasn't what I think it is," Squall said as he closed his eyes.

Seifer inched his head to look at the seven foot spear, not counting the metal part that was not in the wall.

"If your thinking that is was anything else but a spear that almost killed you, then no, it's not what you think it is," Seifer said sarcastically.

"Shut it," Squall said as he and Seifer looked behind him.

Selphie already was aiming another spear at them along with several of the woman also aiming projectiles.

"Shi...," Seifer began to say before the woman threw the spears at them.

"Go, go, go!" Squall said as he dragged Seifer towards the door that seemed forever away. Spears landed around them, sticking into the ground.

Seifer yelped in pain, causing Squall's head to turn to him. "Are you hit!?"

Seifer just frowned in pain. "My ass," he said. A spear had just grazed him, but let a large cut right across his left cheek.

"Charge!" Selphie said as she bolted down the steps from the elevator.

"We're not going to make it!" Seifer said as the girls came closer.

"Damn it," Squall said while looking around for anything to use. He then spied two spears. He took them and gave one to Seifer.

"Follow my lead," Squall said as he broke off the metal end with a simple kick. Seifer did the same.

"Aim for their heads?" Seifer asked.

"No, their legs," Squall replied as they both threw the long handles of the broken spears at an angle for it to reach the stairs.

Selphie saw the spinning weapons too late as one struck her and another female in the legs, tripping them.

Next came the mother of all domino effects. When Selphie and the other female was hit, when there were about half way down the steps, they instantly fell, causing many of the females to trip over them and pile down over the steps.

Even Rinoa and Quistis were not fast enough to get out of the way as they to fell.

"You know, I didn't think that would work," Seifer said with a smirk.

"Neither did I, lets go." Squall and Seifer finally made it to the door and opened it, gunblades already drawn out of their holsters.

Dr. Kadowaki was just bandaging up Irvine's torso, that had many imprints of woman's shoes and heels on it.

"Hey guys, what's with the blades?" Irvine said.

They completely ignored Irvine, for right now. "Dr. Kadowaki, which side are you on?" Squall said, raising his blade.

Dr. Kadowaki looked at the blades and continued wrapping up Irvine. "No one side, Squall. I merely help those who are injured."

Squall and Seifer let out a sigh of relief. That was until they were shouting and many foot steps coming their way.

"The door!" Seifer said as he jumped into the door way to see the many female students coming their way. Seifer closed the door and locked it, just as pointed tips of weapons came out of the door.

Squall massaged his temples to try to calm himself down. "I need a vacation."

Lvmj: I might go back and rewrite this chap, maybe word it better. What do you guys think?


	7. Cross Dressing?

Lvmj: Okay, I am alive, so please call off the dogs! College has been the major source of my time now, so been difficult to think let alone write another chapter. Hope you like it, though it's short.

Chapter Seven: Cross dressing?

"Whoa, what the hell is going on out there?" Zell said as he sat up from his bed.

Squall and Seifer in the meantime were pulling one of the beds to the door, barricading them selves from the female menace.

"Selphie managed to rally up the rest of the female students," Squall said as he shoved a chair on the bed.

"I think she is still mad at that prank we pulled," Seifer said with a small grin on his face.

"Do not count me in your dumb prank!" Squall yelled at Seifer, who gave a simple shrug.

"Anyway, we need to get out of here. They have the male students all duck taped in the upper classroom." Seifer said nonchalantly

Zell and Irvine looked at him with big eyes, wondering how the hell could he say it like that.

"I suggest you hurry," Squall said, signaling both Zell and Irvine in a mad rush to grab their things, clothes and such.

"Aw, crap! I don't have my gun!" Irvine said.

"Yeah, Selphie kind of got trigger happy with it," Squall said as he started planning an escape.

"Damn it! Okay, I need a gun, who's willing to go through them to get my spare?"

His question was answered by silence.

"Come on!" Irvine wined as he grabbed his hat in desperation. "At least you Squall, you're the Commander! You are supposed to help your subordinates!"

Squall simply frowned. He had him there.

".....fine."

"Yeah! Now, come on, let's head out the window!" Irvine said as he walked to the window to open it.

Squall simply let out a small sigh as he turned his attention to the others.

"Seifer, Zell, Doctor, turn off the lights and hide. They may break their way in through the windows, if they aren't on their way over here now."

Zell nodded while Seifer scoffed. Doctor Kadowaki simply nodded as both Squall and Irvine headed out the window.

Minutes later.......

Irvine and Squall were attempting to sneak by the hordes of females.

Keyword: ATTEMPT

They were having a ridiculous hard time getting past them. No matter where they went, the female students would be around ever corner.

"Shit, what are we going to do?" Irvine said as a student was rounding the corner. They were currently crouching in the main square.

"Go, to the other side!" Squall whispered as he saw the girl coming.

Irvine quickly crawled but saw another girl round the opposite corner.

"Shit, we are trapped!" Irvine said.

Squall looked both ways, his neck threatening to snap from the turn.

"Come on!" Squall took hold of Irvine's shoulder and jumped over the edge.

"Wait!" Sploosh, right into the circular fountain. Both girls came running after they heard a sound to only meet eachother.

"Did you hear that?" the student asked.

"Yeah....guess it was nothing." They soon went the opposite way.

"Okay, we need to improvise," Irvine said as he tried to rean out the water from his coat. Squall didn't really like the sound of that.

"Improvise? How?"

Irvine gave Squall a cheeky grin as he trudged through the fountain towards the dorms, perticularly the girls.

"Trust me Squall, after this, we will be invisible to them."

Several more minutes later.....

"Irvine, if you ever try to persuade to get me into a dress, let alone wear a bra, I will personally shove mine and Seifer's gunblade up your ass then down your throat!" Irvine, now, was in a dress with toilet paper stuffed in his chest to imitate breasts. He attempted to get Squall to do the same thing, which he declined rather quickly.

"F-fine! Geez, just trying to help," Irvine said as he tossed Squall a pack that held his clothes.

"I will go through the vents, since I am small enough, and meet you in your dormroom," Squall said as he slashed up the metal cover.

"Alright, see you there," Irvine said as he fixed his hair so it would be over his eyes.

Squall lifted a brow at the act. "You're getting into this, aren't you?"

Irvine chuckled. "Not the first time I did this!"

Squall's normal stoic face faltered at that. "uh....yeah," Squall said as he quickly ducked into the vent.

Irvine held in his laughter when he saw the look on Squall's face. _"Damn, should have brought a camera!"_ he thought. In actuallity, this is his first, and last, time he ever wear women's clothing.

Irvine then slapped his cheeks to get psyced up. "Alright, time for those acting classes to pay off."

Lvmj: All right, special thanks to "SeeD Selphie Tilmitt" who reminded me of this story from her review. I for one am in a Writer's Block, a well known enemy for all writers. Any ideas in the future you can think of PM me or leave it in the review.


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